Wondering how common the feeling of ‘stuckness’ is for everyone else. Cliche as it may sound, sometimes I feel like I’m just frozen in amber, as I witness the movement of the world happening all around me. This might not be so terrible, had I the ability to remove myself from the equation while this is happening, but I know that with the passing of these movements — and time in general — there’s consequences in store, if I choose or attempt to sit it out for too long: there’s bills to pay as well as personal relationships to tend to, and people get restless and move on, or forget you exist, if you don’t keep up with them. Despite this feeling, I sometimes have, I know it’s unfair to those around me.

Were those I’m closest to choose to be so negligent in times when I needed their presence of mind or being, I’m sure my feelings would suffer for it, and over time, I might not want to deal it with any longer. This past week, I feel as though I’ve been hiding out from real-life. Real-life is something that I want to be a part of, and I can’t just hide out in my head or cooped up in my apartment for long, otherwise I begin to feel like I’m losing touch with everything that means anything to me. Or maybe I’m just afraid that I’m being forgotten or some kind of intangible distance is forming. Perhaps this is all just in my head. Whatever it is, I can’t let myself stagnate.

Not really sure what I’m attempting to say with this entry, though sometimes getting any kind of feeling out there feels somehow substantial.